Words

Words.

You might know a few.  (Yes, I say that tongue in cheek.)  

If there is something I have learned about in my life, it is how to use words.

Words have power. 

Words carry more than just one meaning.

Words can manipulate. 

Words can change the world. 

Words can hurt. 

Words can heal.

Lately, I have been thinking much on the use of words.  It might be that we are entering a season of political debates, ads, and speeches.  It could be because I am writing tons of words it seems for reviews, essays, and more. Maybe it is because in this season of Advent, I am being more aware of the words I speak.

You might have heard this before:

   

As a kid, this was sort of a mantra for me.  Whenever ill words were spoken to me, I would just remind myself of this. 

Ok.  I’ll be honest. Knowing the bossy know-it-all kind of kid I was, I most likely sing-song chanted this back in someone’s face.  (I’ll own it.)

As an adult and as someone who works with children and youth, I now highly disagree with this statement.

Words can hurt. 

Possibly even more than sticks or stones. 

In some ways, cruel words are worse – you can’t see the mark they leave on someone.

I recently FINALLY shared this story with my former youth group; I had never really explained it to anyone why I don’t wear red, but we’d been talking about speaking kindly to one another and this seemed a good time as any to share.

Why Katy Never Wears Red: A True Story

For over 12 years, I never wore the color red.  When I said red, I mean that bright cheery Christmas type of red.  The kind you can’t help but smile because it seems a color that is so contagiously happy.  I would wear maroon or darker red (such as the Austin College crimson…) but never pure red.

The only time this ever was really a problem was when Christmas or Valentine’s came around, and even then, one can get away with black. J

I’ve had many people “pester” me saying that I look good in red and should wear it more often.

But there is a reason why red has remained out of my wardrobe.

In 8^th grade I had a beloved bright, cheery red sweater I wore probably more than necessary. ( I can still remember how soft it was…I think it was a Texas Rangers pullover…)  In case you didn’t know this about me, I also happened to be an overweight youth.

One day at school, while wearing said sweater, a fellow student (a bully) told me I looked like a “great big fat tomato”.

Silly, I know.  But I hated tomatoes at that time.  And I was a bit self-conscious of being larger than all my peers. All that combined led me to avoid the color red.

The End.

So why do I share this silly little story?  Because of the impact four words had on my life. You might think, “Oh Katy, grow up!”  And I did…over twelve years. This story now serves as a reminder of what ill spoken words can mean to someone, even if they seem silly to us.

I feel blessed to claim more stories of kind words spoken to me than ill words.  But one conversation with mean words takes away all those stories.  (Think warm fuzzies and cold pricklies.)

 I think in today’s society where outlets to voice our opinions are endless, we at times seem encouraged to speak words without really thinking of how they will affect others.

We are called by Christ to speak kindly to others:

·       * Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  ~Ephesians 4:32 

·       * She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.                           ~ Proverbs 31:26 

·         * So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, ... ~Philippians 2:1-30

So, we speak kindly.

Even when driving in the ATL.

Even when everyone else is being mean and ugly. 

Even when we don’t get the grade from the professor we feel we “deserve”.

Even when our sister leaves the toilet paper roll empty and you discover too late (long story…).

There is something to be said in speaking kind to each other, especially strangers.  It’s unexpected.  It’s not “normal” to not react negatively.

 So, let us try to speak kind words this week. Maybe it can be your Advent practice this week. 

I would challenge you to think a bit more about the words you might say before opening your mouth or typing them online. 

Words have power.

Words can change the world.

Words can heal.

Gracious God, thank you for the ability to speak kindly to one another.  We don’t know each other’s burdens so give us grace to share with others.  Just as Christ spoke to his followers in love, I pray so will we.  I pray we reflect on the meaning of this Advent; this is a season of waiting.  Let us wait with loving hearts and kindness to share with others, this day and all days.  In your most holy name, Amen.

(one more cheesy poster:)