Honestly Homesick

I had the idea that I would be posting something different today, but think I'm going to be honest with myself and write this one.   Every time I sat down to write the other post, I just couldn't do it.  Not that it was all a happy-rainbows-butterflies-julie-andrews-would-sing-a-song-about-this type of posts, but I just had a bit of a heavy heart.  

I've  made it three weeks here at Cambridge!  I've made it through first weeks of school, traveling, moving, walking, worshiping, and more!  

And yet today, I've just yearned for familiar. 

It probably started with the poached egg at breakfast; while it was great, it wasn't as good as my dad's. 

Maybe it was the "bbq chicken" we had for lunch. 

( So not bbq chicken, y'all.)

Maybe it was everyone eating said chicken with a fork and knife (!) and I was just wondering how in the world people were managing to do this magic. 

Maybe it was watching us eat (and me so trying so so so hard to figure out the knife and fork combination) that reminded me of how my grandmother could pick a piece of chicken clean.  With her fingers. 

Maybe it was the hearing of the loss of Pete Seeger, a man whose music I love, but mostly today felt the grief I felt when I lost another ninety year old man whose music I loved just as much, if not more. 

Maybe it was talking to my sister and hearing that she had a bad day and I couldn't easily call and cheer her up.

Maybe it was the walk I took to the "other" side of Cambridge which felt like the "other" side of Decatur.  The side you "shouldn't go to" but still do because it's there and that's where the cheaper produce is. 

Maybe it was the postcard that arrived with handwriting that is so familiar and dear to my heart. 

Maybe it's that I miss the classrooms (AND PROFESSORS AND STUDENTS...and the use of gender-inclusive language...) that I've grown familiar and comfortable in and with at Columbia.

  (Not that I don't love it here...just different.)

Maybe it was seeing a friend getting to be with dear friends and making me miss the special friends I have, spread across many, many, many miles. 

Maybe it's because I truly believe google.com is better than google.co.uk. 

(Same with amazon. #sorrynotsorry)

Maybe it was because I had a bit of a sick day and we all know how we can sometimes feel on sick days. 

#iwantmymommy #popscicles #bluepoweradezeroALWAYS

Maybe it's because I've started to second guess how I pronounce things since I'm the only one who says it the way I do.  (Such as yogurt, process, celebratory, ecumenism and many more.) 

(Not that I don't love it here...just different.)

But mostly, I bet I'm feeling this way because of all the snow announcements coming from the states. 

Seriously - it is snowing in Decatur, GA. 

Austin had a snow day last week. 

AUSTIN. 

And then there was that freak Spring-ish day weather thrown in there too. 

Cambridge is sunny with a wee bit of rain and just cold. 

But not too cold. 

Bearable cold. 

And I'm 20 degrees farther north in the latitude realm from all y'all.

Whatever the reason, I've yearned for the familiar today. For the familiar laugh I can pick out in a hallway, the way I can eat with people and pour hot sauce on everything and then maybe eat with just a fork, and for the ringing of my US phone with the ridiculous Pitch Perfect song as my ringtone.  

I've yearned a wee bit to have a conversation where I didn't have to tell a story in order to tell the story. 

And hang on - I'm about to get really whiney:

I kind of want my own bed and own blanket.  And peanut butter.  

And I kind of want to play in snow. 

And yes, this is bigger than just things.  I am missing some people who even if I was able to be in their cities, they wouldn't be there. 

So honestly, I'm a bit homesick despite how absolutely lovely it is here with the wonderful, kind, and caring people that do surround me. 

But that's where I am tonight.

  And I just wanted to be honest.  

And I won't sit in this puddle of "woe is me" - I'm going to make a cup a tea, have a tea cake and possibly paint my nails, which is pretty familiar to what I would do back home. 

Just a bit different.